Memories

i'm so puzzled by one thing.
i've realised that aunties n uncles like to listen to "ai bia jia eh ya" when they r cooking/working. serious. i'm hearing it now, this very minute as i blog. my staff seemed to enjoy it. my mum too listened to it when she is cooking or doing housework.
vy vy vy???
like dat more power is it?
hmm......
n by listening to wat music my staff listen to, i had another shocking discovery.
i heard the hokkien version of "xiao wei".
yes.
am i ignorant or am i ignorant?
my staff say "long long time ago have liao, u duno meh?"
wah lau. gana suan.
amazing la. these hokkien songs r spawning so fast.
wah, now my fav song.
"ai dio li sim kia kia, sio dio li sim tia tia....."
woohoo!
i think i hav to go into H-pop now.
hokkien pop.
wah biang eh.

on an entirely diff note, i saw a bangla (ya, again) toking on the hp w one hand as he cycled on the road.
beside my bus.
the bus driver was horning at him as we drove by. the bicycle was travelling in a "s" manner. so so fucking dangerous.
na beh. dun wan life is it? wats so impt that u hav to tok on the phone when u cycle on the road????
ur wife give birth?
ur dog died on the way to give birth?
ur son poo-ed on ur bed, w ur wife still sleeping on it?
or ur son swim in a swimming pool w the cleaner still cleaning the pool despite ur son's presence in the pool? (eh, familar)
knn. these ppl really dun hw to write "die".
it reminds me of a sad memory i've always wanted to forget.
happened in yishun too.
i hav this secondary sch mate (3 yrs younger then me) whom i was close to during my wild days. she was those kind of ren xing gal, always wanted attention, always complaining that ppl dun give her enuff love n care.
the incident happened after i graduate from sec sch.
i was singing ktv w my poly frens in orchard, when my pager (ya, dat time got pager v high tech liao) showed a msg.
"jos is in hospital. critical. pls call me back. L"
my mind went blank instantly. after knowing which hospital she was in, i rushed down immediately. as it was quite late (around 8 plus) when i reached, no one i knew was there. i went into the ICU myself, n i will not, for the rest of my life, forget the scene i saw.
she was lying there, lifeless, n the docs shaved her head bald, with stitches on her head. they've punctured a hole in her throat to facilitate breathing.
she had always loved her long black hair, n was proud of it.
n then, she was bald.
i cant take it. i was in total shock when i saw this. i called her name, telling her dat 'lao ba' is here (she used to call me lao ba in sch, cos i was v fierce to her).
no reaction.
i went out ot the ICU to get some fresh air. then i saw a few of her frens, whom i noe well, outside, weeping. they came n hugged me when they saw me. my heart was crying then, but as the 'lao jiao' there, i refused to show my tears.
then they told me wat happened.
apparently, jos (my coma fren) had this bf for a few mths. then, this boy, out of the blue, called her dat afternoon, telling her dat he wanted a breakup w her. jos was devastated. she wanted to speak to the boy, but the boy refused. so, she cycled to the boy's house (both of them stayed in yishun) to confront him.
she was knocked down by a bus on the way to the bf's hse. two blocks away from his hse. according to the statement of the driver, she cycled in the opposite direction of the traffic on the road, which was wrong. so, the driver escaped punishment.
n the boy freaked out when told of her accident.
he refused to visit her in the hospital.
bastard.
it was late october dat time, where all of them hav to take thier 'o' levels.
jos scored an 'A' for her chinese. she told her frens dat she's nt happy even she had scored an 'A', cos she still did nt get the love from the ppl around her.
she shd c wat her frens n family did during her coma period.
her mum was there, 24 hrs, waiting for her to wake up.
her frens was there everyday after sch, calling her name, singing n toking to her every single day.
we folded as many paper birds (swan?) as we could, trying to get all the good luck we could.....
i've even learn to sing her fav english song. juz to wake her up.
but no, she didn't.
her mum was telling us one nite
"she is always saying that ppl dun love her. but look at us. silly girl, we all loved her so dearly"
n we all wept after her mum said dat.
even the sch principal was here.
non of her frens studied for their 'o' levels. simply bcos they really really dun hav the mood to.
the older ppl (including me) scolded them, asking them to treasure the chance which jos dun hav.
they listened to us. but they still come everyday to visit jos.
then, smth happend.
the boy came. visited her, toked to her.
n she woke up 2 days later.
i was in the middle of my tutorial when they paged me n told me dat jos opened her eyes.
after one week, she called me lao ba again.
overjoyed. u bet.
but well, the story doesn't end here.
due to the accident, her neurons n nerves for her left side of the body was damaged (she's a left hander some more), thus, she can't move her left legs n hand.
jos tried to recover, going thru all the therapies n all. but she never recover. she was so disappointed dat she gave up on herself. she refuses to c ppl. n we lost contact w her totally.
after 7 yrs, i saw her frens at alley bar early this yr. i asked abt her. all of them gave me a bitter look. they told me that she gave up on herself, n her left side of the body went thru muscle atrophy. so will b wheelchair bound for the rest of her life.
i'm pretty upset abt it. but wat can we do. she had to help herself.
it will b her birthday next week.
josline, i noe u wun b able to c this. but i really wan to say this.
thank u for remembering my birthday every year (b4 the accident), sending me cards w the bob dog u drew on the cards.
thank u for remembering me as ur lao ba when u woke up from ur coma.
sorry for not helping in any way. sorry for always scolding u in the past. sorry for not visiting u for the past few years.

老爸好害怕。老爸怕看到你就不知道要说什么，怕自己哭，怕自己让你不开心。
我好没用，帮不了你什么。
可是你要知道，你曾经在我心中占去了很重要的位置。你是我的好女儿。
你常说世界是黑暗的，因为没人爱你。
你错了。
我们都爱你。

你曾说过，如果有一天你老妈结婚了，你会一直在我身边。她已经在六月结婚了。而你，不在。
我还没忘记我们的约定。你呢？
你要好好加油哦！不要放弃生命，好吗？
让我们在世界不一样的角落一起努力，好吗？
你生日快到了。我没忘。
祝你生日快乐。